


You've Got Everything But You Don't Know Anything

by artikgato



Category: Persona 4
Genre: Anal Sex, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Sexual Confusion, you know the usual yosuke things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-22
Updated: 2018-04-22
Packaged: 2019-04-26 09:03:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14398764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artikgato/pseuds/artikgato
Summary: He wanted to hate all of it, but he couldn’t. It had felt too good. He knew he’d never get the breathy way Souji had called him ‘Partner’ out of his head.





	You've Got Everything But You Don't Know Anything

**Author's Note:**

> I don't really like how this one turned out, but I figured I might as well post it anyway.

“I trust you,” Yosuke says. “I know you’ll stop if I tell you to. I know you’d never do anything to hurt me on purpose, and you won’t tease me about this. And...I’m just, really curious, you know?”

That’s what he said, but what he  _ didn’t _ say was how nervous he was, how  _ scared _ he was - not that he was going to hate this, or regret it. He was terrified that he  _ wasn’t _ going to hate it. He wanted to hate it so bad, because more than anything he was doing this to prove to himself that he was  _ straight _ , that he  _ wasn’t _ gay, that he  _ didn’t _ want a dick in his ass. 

He really did want to hate it. He wanted to hate all of it, so bad, but -  _ fuck _ , it felt so good. Souji was so gentle and calm and reassuring with him, and he wanted to hate him for it. He wanted to protest that he was a  _ man _ , damn it, and he didn’t need to be touched like he was made of glass, treated like he was fragile - but when Souji touched him like that, all slow and tender and careful, it made him feel... _ special _ . Souji could have been hard and rough and impatient and just taken what he wanted but what he wanted seemed to be for Yosuke to  _ enjoy _ this. He was so sure and gentle and patient as he opened Yosuke up, prodding and pushing and stretching with slow, steady movements, and Yosuke wanted to hate it  _ so much _ . He was naked from the waist down and kneeling on Souji’s futon with his ass in the air like...like some kind of  _ slut _ , and he wanted to hate it so much. He wanted to hate the anticipation, the nerves...everything.

He wanted to hate the feeling of Souji pushing his dick into him, too. He wanted so desperately to hate the feeling of that hard head pushing gently into his carefully stretched hole, past the ring of tight muscle and inside. He wanted to hate the feeling of Souji’s dick pressing up against his insides, pushing in deep. He wanted to hate how he could feel it throbbing, how he could feel Souji’s racing heartbeat deep inside himself. He wanted to hate what Souji sounded like as he panted and gasped, desperately fighting for control over himself. He wanted to hate the feeling of Souji’s hips pressed into his ass. He wanted to hate how his own cock was rock hard and aching to be touched. 

He wanted to hate how much he wanted Souji to move, and how fucking amazing it felt once he  _ did _ . He wanted to hate the way he cried out when Souji’s swollen head dragged against his prostate, how sensitive he felt, how he knew he could come just from that feeling alone. He wanted to hate the feeling of Souji’s hands gripping his ass hard, how it felt to have Souji leaning over him and panting and gasping out his name with such desperation behind it. He wanted to hate how every thrust made him want to shout, how he wanted to move back against the rocking motion of Souji’s hips. He wanted to hate how every time Souji’s cock pushed inside him it made him see stars. He wanted to hate the steadily growing puddle of precum collecting under his body as he gasped and shuddered and barely stopped himself from begging Souji to go harder, to go faster. 

He wanted to hate it when Souji gasped out the word ‘Partner’, all hot and desperate and right in his ear, and how just from that he came all over the sheets. He wanted to hate the fact that he’d gotten off without even being touched - just the feeling of a dick in his ass and a few sweet moans from Souji had been enough, and he wanted to hate that  _ so much _ . All he felt was embarrassed and guilty, even as he shuddered and twitched through the most intense orgasm he’d ever felt. He wanted to hate the way Souji moaned his name and came, seemingly in response. He wanted to hate the feeling of warm wetness spilling inside him, but it felt good to know that he’d made Souji come. Souji’s cum felt good inside him, and he wanted to hate that more than anything.

He wanted to hate all of it, but he couldn’t. It had felt too good. He knew he’d never get the breathy way Souji had called him ‘Partner’ out of his head. 

He wanted to hate how careful and tender Souji was with him, how he cleaned him up so gently, how he laid him out on the futon and made sure he was comfortable. He wanted to hate how thoughtful Souji was, gently pushing a bottled water into his hands and smoothing down his hair and handing him his neatly folded clothes.

“How was it?” Souji asked, perched hesitantly on the side of the futon, and it was obvious he wanted to come closer but didn’t know if he could. Yosuke gulped down some water and lowered his vision to his lap, trying to will away the blush on his cheeks.

“I wanted to hate it,” he admitted. He couldn’t look at Souji. “But...but that was amazing.  _ You _ were amazing. I…”

“It’s okay, you know,” Souji reassured him, and he sighed, shaking his head aggressively.

“Y-you don’t get it! I was trying to prove that I’m straight and... and all I did was prove the opposite, dammit,” Yosuke sighed, bowing his head a little. He felt the burn of tears trying to well up, and he wanted to hate that, too. He felt the futon shift, and Souji put an arm around his shoulders, pulling Yosuke against him. 

“It’s okay,” Souji said. Just that, and nothing else, and he just let Yosuke lean against him and bury his face in his neck with a sigh. He probably noticed it when Yosuke started to cry, but if he did he didn’t say anything, just reached up and rubbed comforting circles into Yosuke’s back. Yosuke eventually pulled away, embarrassed as hell and trying as hard as he could not to sniffle. Souji let his hands fall down to his sides, and Yosuke looked away, ashamed, only to see the stain on the sheets from where he’d…

“Souji…” Yosuke eventually managed to croak out. “I...I don’t know what to do.”

“That’s okay,” Souji reassured him. He wasn’t looking at Souji, but he saw him start to reach out for him, hesitate, and then let his hand fall back. “You’ll figure it out, eventually.”

“I wanna figure it now,” he mumbled, with a pout, and he heard Souji chuckle. He finally looked at him, frowning, wanting to tell him off, but, well, Souji was really cute when he was laughing. He didn’t even need to be gay to know that, it was just a universal truth, really. 

Maybe it was okay if he didn’t have things figured out, just yet. Maybe that wasn’t so terrible. Maybe he didn’t need to call himself gay, or bisexual, or heteroflexible or whatever other stupid terms there were - maybe, for now, he just needed to be Yosuke. And he just needed Souji to be Souji, his Partner. And maybe he needed to admit that he was probably a little bit in love with Souji, and he’d just had amazingly good sex with him. 

“Can I...can I ask you for one more favor?” Yosuke asked, unsuccessfully fighting off a blush that was creeping its way onto his cheeks and ears. Souji nodded. “Can you...kiss me?”

“Are you sure you want that?” Souji asked, but the fact that he scooted closer to Yosuke betrayed him - he wanted to kiss Yosuke, and Yosuke could tell. 

“I’m sure,” Yosuke said, and closed his eyes, signalling to Souji that he had full control over the situation. Yosuke didn’t think he had the guts to initiate the kiss - this time anyway - and if Souji was the one that did, it took so much of the pressure off of him, and-

And,  _ wow _ . Souji’s lips felt good on his. Souji’s hand gently cradling his cheek felt nice, too. He kissed back, because he  _ needed _ to know how it would feel to do that and...somehow, it was almost as overwhelming as the sex had been. He didn’t want to hate this, though. Then again, deep down he didn’t  _ really _ want to hate the sex, either…

“Was that okay?” Souji asked, nearly breathless, when he finally pulled away. Yosuke nodded without opening his eyes, also panting for breath. “G-good. Do you want me to do it again, or…?”

“Please,” Yosuke gasped, nearly moaned, and Souji’s mouth was back on his in an instant, and he felt Souji shifting around on the futon, felt him put his free arm around Yosuke’s back and press them firmly together, kissing more aggressively. He felt Souji’s tongue prod against his lips and opened them, eagerly, moaning when Souji’s tongue pushed into his mouth. 

“W-we should stop here,” Souji panted after they’d pulled away a second time. This time Yosuke did open his eyes, looking up at him confused. Souji blushed. “I’ll- if...if we keep going like this, I’ll get hard again, and-”

“That’s fine,” Yosuke answered, almost immediately, surprising himself almost as much as Souji. Yosuke leaned back in, and he wasn’t sure where this newfound determination was coming from, but he wasn’t about to question it. He kissed Souji this time, and was pleasantly surprised at how Souji melted against him almost immediately. They ended up laying down side-by-side, lazily making out, hands wandering. And, honestly, Yosuke thought he could get used to this. He didn’t want to hate  _ this _ . And maybe...maybe that wasn’t so bad?


End file.
